This has been a very difficult day.   I suppose you know what is coming.   I wish I could say that you are wrong but it is not to be.

This morning we woke up to find that Chelsea was still in a great deal of distress.  I gave her some more pain killers but there was no relief.  I called Kettle Moraine at about 6:30AM to tell them the circumstances and our decision.   They had received the report from Lakeshore so were up to date on her condition.   I told them that Dick and I had agreed that if there was no improvement by this morning we were not going to make her hang in there for us.  

I was able to get an appointment for 8:30AM with a Dr. Crispin.  She was kind and understanding.  I carried Chelsea in to the room and held her until it was all over.   Her little head was wet with my tears.   It is so hard to say goodbye but she was so trusting and after it was over, I was glad to see her peaceful again.   That poor little hunched up pain filled body was more than I could take.   I am feeling very disconnected but know that after I can get some sleep and my thoughts and feelings gathered up, I will be fine.  Dick will be too.   I am already finding that I kind of look for her.   When you make arrangements for this they ask three questions.   1.  Do you want to take the body with you?   No.  2.  Do you want a private cremation where you get the ashes?  No.   3.  Do you want a group cremation?   Yes.  

I told Sue at the clinic that I don't need her ashes, she will always be in my heart.  I know she will be up there at the gates of heaven along with Zero, Chelsea, Oscar, Chip, Clancy, Sam, Sam, (yes there were two), Tara and even Taco and Belle.   What a day that will be.

But today, I am sad.  Please pray for me.


I took Dick to the eye doctor today.   His right eye is 99 % improved.  The left eye is is bit infected now, Dr. Cheryl thinks it might have spread.   We will doctor this week and recheck next Tuesday.

Pray for both of us.

God love you

Mary